Just Buy It

Growing up, we were by no means wealthy.  Our weekends were spent at the flea markets and random garage sales in nicer neighborhoods.  A trip to the local Pic'n'Save meant I might get some new outfits for my Barbies, but a trip to Target meant I would just browse the $15 Barbies from afar, hoping and wishing I'd get one for Christmas.  Our TV was a small 19", if that.  We had a smaller black and white TV with two knobs, one to change the channel, and one to attempt to make the screen a bit more clear.  Eating at Sizzler was a treat.  Most of the time, we had dim sum on the weekends with extended family or we ate at home.

To be generous, my parents were frugal (like what I did there?!)  At a young age, I knew to say no to wine taste and beer salary, and yet I hadn't even taken my first sip of alcohol yet.  My parents were hard working middle class parents, trying to shield their children of the financial burdens and stress they faced everyday.  But I wasn't oblivious.  I knew we weren't rich.  I knew we were actually kind of on the poor side.  I knew the San Marino snobs I took dance with all had four or five recital numbers and I had one.  I knew my parents fought about how much piano lessons were and I overheard my mom say over and over how important it was for me to develop my "class" and have that skill!  I knew my parents borrowed money from richer family members.  I knew my grandma always footed the bill when we went out to eat.  I knew.  They didn't think I knew.. but I did.

In 1996, things seemed to pick up.  My mom began doing real estate and she was really quite good at it.  By 1998, we had our first large screen television.  By 2001, we had cable (still mad to this day that it was after I went away to college!).  My brother, six years younger, never truly experienced the "poor" days of my life.  My dual income parents now made quite a bit of money, so much that my financial aid was reduced a lot my senior year.

Money isn't as hard to come by for my parents as it was when I was younger.  My mom bought me a Vitamix when I was engaged and said it was for my future family.  "So you can making smoothies for your husband and kids every single day."  She gave us her van a few years later when she couldn't stand the site of our firstborn cramped in our Camry.  "Needing bigger car for baby, help him be happier.  Take my van."  Upon Jordan's first time sitting in the van, she commented, "See how much happier he is in the big van?  Kids like big cars, not little cramped cars like you were driving.  This is much better."

So when my mom saw me post on Facebook that I couldn't bring the Vitamix with us to DC (it's got an extremely heavy base), she called me immediately.

"You need to bring the Vitamix!"  she told me.  "How are the kids going to drinking smoothies everyday?!"  she asked.

"Well... it's kind of heavy."  I told her.  "Then Dad can bring you one when he goes!" (For the record, he's coming mid April.. that's 1.5 months into our trip. ....

"Mom, it's okay.  We don't need it.  Lots of poor people do without Vitamixs and are still healthy," (Did I really say that?  Shoot, I didn't mean that I just... wow, my mom really brings out the worse in me sometimes...)

"Don't be so cheap!  Just go buy one!" she screamed.  "I'll pay for it!"

Let me stop right here and tell you how many times she has said this.

"Mom, I can't work out right now at Equinox because it's too expensive."
I'll pay for it!
Mom, I can't buy more clothes right now, we don't have enough money for clothing purchases not out of need."
I'll pay for it!
No, Andy doesn't want to take me to a nice steakhouse, he refuses to pay for fancy food he'll just poop out later.
I'll pay for it!
Jordan broke our TV.  We think we should wait a while so he learns a lesson.  Sure, we can replace it - but it's the principle of the matter.
I'll pay for it!

I know, I know.  Does she even listen to me?

And then when I send her photos of clothes I think she might say "I'll pay for it!" she never ceases to amaze me by responding with "That's ugly, don't get that" or "that's too plain, get something fancier" and the best is when Jordan asked if maybe po po  would buy him the toy.  I suggested we take a photo and ask her, she responded with, "stop buying them toys, I'll only buy them books from now on!"

Needless to say, I ended our Vitamix conversation with, "Mom... it's not about the money.  It's about the fact that we're there for 2 months and it's too heavy to bring!  We will be fine for TWO months.  Is this all you called to talk about?  Because if so, I'm kind of busy right now--CLICK.

And there you go.  Just buy it Daisy.  ....